Wrong Vampire

I consider myself a fairly tolerant person. I judge each person on their merits, not their skin color, gender or even sexual orientation. I'm even in favor of the Vampire Rights Amendment, but I must admit, unlike other groups people discriminate against, they make me uneasy. They claim that all they want to do is peacefully co-exist with humans, but how many people did they kill before there was synthesized human blood? To my knowledge, I've never even encountered one, but ever since they "came out of the coffin" a few years ago, we know they are out there and I do sometimes wonder, are they a threat to us all?

Either way, I doubt I ever encounter one, considering they use to eat people, simple logic says the vampire-to-human ratio must be low, and while I live in a fairly populated area (Northern Arlington, Virginia) right out of DC, I have no reason to think I would be unlucky enough to encounter one. Or at least that's what I tell myself when I see the Vampire spokesman on TV, advocating equal rights, or even when I see the synthesized blood at the local convenience store, but I try not to give it much thought.

So this Friday, a bunch of co-workers were planning on going to happy hour at this bar down the street from work. I'm the new guy in the office, having just moved up from North Carolina a few years ago, so while I'm not particularly close to anybody at work, I needed to make some new friends. I've been in town for about 3 months and haven't had sex since I've been here. Most guys would say the same thing, but for me, it's definitely a lack of trying. I've never had any problems with women, and there are plenty here, but my job is really stressful. It's not a hard job, but there's the 6 month probation period, where I could get fired without cause if my supervisors thought I wasn't a good fit.

So it's Friday and I'm at work, trying to get this website up when my boss Walt comes walking over. He stands over me starring before he finally says, "Jackson, get your head out of your rear, that last posting you submitted was full of errors!"