Ups and downs

I rarely write stories that I post.
After my last story, I have managed to become a verified AST model.
Wow! I remember the feeling when I saw the purple icon next to my name. I'm among the greats, I thought.

But life as a model is like life itself. Ups and downs.
I may look tough in my videos but I'm very sensitive when it comes to criticism.
If I get "likes" and kind comments, I'm in heaven, but on the contrary, I'm down in the shit and nothing feels meaningful.
It's really hard to live like that, but recording videos to share is the most fun I know, so I'll probably continue for a while.

An example from yesterday. Someone consistently downvoted my videos and comments.
I asked if I'm really that ugly and unattractive and he thought so and wanted me to dress up somewhere else.
It stung I can say. But I am strong and bounce back.

Then we have the age. I am 61 years old and have a little anxiety about it. I want to look as good as possible in my videos, so there will be a lot of time in front of the mirror.

But then we have the positive side
I sometimes get comments and messages from both boys and girls in their 30s wanting to play with me and that's flattering I must say at 61. Maybe I don't look so bad then anyway

And all my friends and fans I've made in my journey here at AST are amazing. I love you guys and I hope you keep following me

This might have been a boring story to read about but I feel like venting some emotions.

Your little Mikaela